As fast as I can...

FIRST, I'd like to thank Jaxson and COMPLIMENT HER for single handedly keeping this blog and the morale UP, UP, UP... THANK YOU

Without your (slightly threatening) encouragement, and depressing expressions of your waivering mental health status, I would not have (literally) DROPPED EVERYTHING i WAS WORKING ON to post some graphs...

CHART ONE: EXPLANATION
OF MY TIME SPENT AT WORK TODAY



As you can see, I didn't have time CREATE the CHART the proper way, with data, and spreadsheets, and whatnot...
but I wanted to respond quickly, so I just drew them on the back of a napkin and uploaded them as fast as I could!!!

The next bar graph is meant to show the things in my life that get a "quick response" when they/he/she call out in need:



I hope this proves my level of devotion and commitment to my IMPORTANT commitments!

That's what friends are for....

Hello "Friends" -

This week has really opened my eyes. I have recently come to terms with who my real friends are. These people will support you no matter what decision you make…..that is …..unless that decision is to attend a different softball game than the one they're playing in. After an in depth texting "conversation" with Jackie I realized there are very few acceptable reasons to miss a Cheshire Softball game. Although we'd all assume a Lil Wayne Concert is one of those items - we are in fact wrong. I'm simply embarrassed for anyone that would think otherwise.















As most of you know I did in fact miss a game this week for one of the above "unacceptable" items. This resulted in complete destruction of my reputation as a reliable player as well as the destruction of my self esteem. Should I have gone to Cheshire and skipped my co-ed game??? Should I have risked my co-ed team forfeit due to not enough girls to play?? Should I have never signed up for that team?? These were all thoughts in my head as I was laying in bed last night receiving ridiculous amounts of sh*t for missing one game. Which leads me to this….
























Now for those that chose to respond to my lack of attendance with Option D - Cyber Bullying - well shame on you...



















As I recover from the copious amounts of cyber-bullying I have been receiving I have to ask myself - is this abuse worth the joy of being on this team? Simple answer - yes.

MVP Standings...

And the MVP Leaders are...










As I'm sure many of you know I have been collecting data since the beginning of the season. This data has directly lead to our current MVP Standings. Since this data goes as far back as our pre-season get-together at Deb and Sue's I was forced to include Teri - who since that event has been....well....absent....

There is a complex weighted data set behind this chart. I have broken down at a high level how the standings were calulated.....

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Highlights:

Katy: at all the games, organized Sushi Palace night, catches every game, loves beets unconditionally - is the Dwight K. Schrute of our team

Teri: Teri has been MIA since our pre-season party - is the Creed Bratton of our team.

Tracy: at all the games, laughs while making plays, Sushi Palace night was for her b-day, takes pictures of kids urinating in parking lots, created this blog - is the Michael Scott of our team.

Britt: ate her weight in sushi at Sushi Palace, allows the team to call her various nicknames, Mercury Poisoning threatened her life, sends sassy emails when there are unfunny charts being sent - is the Stanley of our team.

Tara: Tara is lucky to be included in this chart, let alone our team. She is obviously the Meredith of our team

Jackie: at all the games, mocks 2 yr old children, nicknamed the DBs, teaches children the importance of a rape whistle, encourages children to seek weapons from sarah, feels bad that casey anthony spent all that time in prison when she was in fact innocent. one major negative for Jax was her scolding of Britt as Sushi Palace claiming she would in fact "waste food" - is the Angela of our team

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Looking forward to our Dundies....

Time is on our side

A few things...
FIRST- I would like to praise the tiny baby jesus for sending me many blessings, including friends that were able to figure out the simplest blogging formatting system ever invented.

I'm proud of you JAX! And SARAH! (And you too, WEB- don't think I didn't see that you are working on a post!!!) For trying something new and giving us some great stuff on the f-bags blog. You are all MVPs in my book!!!

(Remember, the F stands for FUN you dirty minds out there!!!)

SECOND - Here is a slide I made tonight. I think you'll find that the headings and labels are self-explanatory and it requires no further introduction:



(Please NOTE: As with all these charts and photos on the blog, clicking on them will make them larger and easier to read.)

Before you get all, "OMG, Tracy... How did you have time to do this?!?" Take a look at the screen shot of the stopwatch on my iPhone which documents EXACTLY how long it took:

And allow me to add this pie chart to "break it down for you":

Mind you, this only took me a little over 18 minutes because, I was thoughtful about it, cared about the aesthetics, gave some consideration to not only how the chart would look, but also took the time to make the jokes funny. Please See Sarah M's post below... she is putting more time into her chart and I'm sure it will send all of us into fits of hysteria (when it is finally completed and posted) because she is taking additional time to "craft" the jokes to perfection, etc

THIRD:
Do you have any idea how many free apps there are out there for chart making?!?
These are just the first 3 I found

FOURTH- I would like to leave you with a little softball love... This is what summer is all about folks...

(click to embiggen)

(click to embiggen)

I included the second one even though the pics are pretty much the same b/c I like how the trooper with the head wound is kind of glancing over- the only parent in sight (not counting the one taking the photo) and also how the boys are sort of checking out each others' tiny little junk.

Sarah, I need a weapon!

This is my first attempt at a blog post, but being not that I'm not a moron and I have been using a computer for about 15 years now, I should think it wouldn't be that difficult to figure it out. I would say the same about my teammates but they have already admitted to being simply too lazy to put forth the effort.

So - knowing that I will be in Haddam again all day tomorrow, I have made use of what limited relaxation time I have with my husband (who is engrossed, equally, in Jake Gyllenthal being on Man vs. Wild and Kill Bill vol. 1 - depending on which program is in commercials, but probably more into Jake Gyllenthal) to create a chart that summarizes tonight's events. I may have missed a few things, but to me, these were the main highlights.

I will miss being on email with you all tomorrow but will be looking forward to some new emails, and maybe, just maybe, a new blog post!

ps. To those of you who say that you are "chart illiterate" (you know who you are...actually, we all do, because you've stated it in previous emails), I just wanted to say that, frankly, I'm embarrassed for you, as I have created this chart in 20 minutes, 15 of which were spent deciding which chart type best aesthetically depicted my data. However, in the event that you have really never created a chart and I am just 'taking for granted' that it comes so easily to me, I suppose we could have a short lesson, entitled, "making charts for dummies" or "making charts, for dummies". The title of the lesson would be fitting no matter where the punctuation goes.

Jax has to talk to negotiate game cancellation

Jax encourages Sarah to come to the game

Tracy responds late to "day after" email thread

I was a little crushed to have been left out of this nonsense, but thanks for giving me a chance to get a little work done today...

also, thanks for coming to my awesome party!
T

Sushi charts related to Tara